a pondering heart

I love this…this mind frame thinking that what I have to say might matter, might influence.  Hubris indeed.

This is all incredibly premature though, at the infancy stage, as I learn who I am and who I am called to be as an author of words.  And I am searching.

Conversations via the written word can be so revealing, and words written full of faith even more so.  Talk about raw vulnerability.  To be willing to enter dialogue with such deep sincerity and unabashed prayers.  Together.  And I have loved it – the mutual give and take, of recognizing the gift of God in the other, and affirming that so boldly.

How I wish there was time and space to do that more often.  Or to be more cognizant of the time and space so that I CAN do it more often.

How much I wish I took advantage of the opportunities to tell others the gifts that are dwelling within, spilling over, pouring out, and yearning for recognition.  To let them know that they are loved, named, known.  Such intimacy.  Such vulnerability.  What an unbelievable gift God has given us in this life, to be in relationship.  And what a waste we can make of it.

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Colleen EM Maillie is a displaced, divorced Presbyterian minister who lives in East Tennessee.

She is a headhunter in the packaging industry, a single mom to her son, and founder of LEADing with Systems..